This blog post attempts to make sense of the massive pile of academic research in archives alongside my own personal journey with grief. I was thinking I need set life to one side in order to organise a new art work and theorise about it. However, art reminds me that life and art are interrelated, interdependent even and I must not make the work in spite of my life but rather hold these two strands, gently alongside each other and see what happens. In May 2022 I climbed up to